I could tell you that I’m tired of being pregnant and I’m so over it, but in truth, I’m more irritated with the anticipation of it all. Only ONE week ago I was feeling terrified about giving birth at home again. I was remembering the pain and the fear and was letting it ruin my joy. Now, at 41 weeks to the day, I’m feeling more mentally prepared than ever because I KNOW that I can do this!
Two years ago I was newly married and still navigating my relationship with my best friend and new husband. I was unsure he was up to the task of being a support to me as this was his first time and I was on my 4th. I was unprepared for the experience, as lovely as it was. Today, I’ve talked over my fears with him and we’ve discussed every aspect that we could anticipate and I know that he is my partner in this.
So in the meantime while waiting for this baby to make his/her debut, I’ve been taking more and more pictures of this little snapdragon still inside! It’s not an easy task to try to capture my visions on camera by myself but I try. I’m pretty critical considering one of my best friends is a professional photographer, and since she has a life and six kids and can’t be with me all the time, I do my best on my own as I learn my camera, lol.
I swear capturing pictures of my rainbow baby toddler and the belly are hard…but we try:)
Every smile, every look, every single moment of joy with this little girl reminds me that I can’t wait to experience all of that with another tiny human being. I’m not afraid anymore, and maybe that’s what all of this waiting is about! Here’s to the process and the extra time it takes for this little one to make it earth side. He/she is in no hurry…and I shouldn’t be either.