Bullies, Racism, and Your Kid’s Shitty Attitude.

I gotta get some shit off of my chest. What do these three things, bullying, racism and a bad attitude have in common.  We frequently think that we have solved these problems and then BOOM! We are face to face with the issue.  I won’t touch on racism in this post but it does fit the criteria of things we mistakenly think are solved but remain like cockroaches.

Just this week, my daughter dealt with bullying for the first time. With all of the zero tolerance going on around the country, it seemed like a foot note in adolescent history, until this last Monday!  Monday was my daughter’s first day of summer camp and she was very shy. Before I left her for the day another mother had instructed their daughter to include my Evelyn and so I felt that she was in good hands and ready for a great day. Then at pick-up I find out that the same little girl instructed to be kind and friendly this morning is the same one whispering to her friend about Evelyn’s clothes and her being “chubby”. I dealt with that situation accordingly and my daughter didn’t go back to camp after that. So I guess bullies are still around……

So here I am today: y’all know I have “shared parenting” with my ex-husband and civility and coparenting communication are the key to sanity.  I bend over backwards to make life smooth because it’s not about how I feel when I’m momming on his time; they are MY KIDS.  And I am HAPPY to fulfill my role. But “shared parenting” is a joke when I’m the one doing all of the real parenting here. Every time my kids are at their dad’s house for longer than a couple of days, they come back hateful and full of complaints that happened while at their dad’s house. Enter the shitty attitudes! 

During a recent pick up I went from one happy baby who just ate a fruit pouch to four kids; three of them full of complaints. Of course none of them can keep their hands to themselves, whether its grabbing a toy or pinching amd shoving.  Then I hear my oldest say that my 6 year old was swearing at her dad and he did nothing………My daughter even says, ” I’m dad’s little princess and I can do what ever I want!” only minutes later. 

So hear I am, working hard to be a good mom.  Always having to calm the storm that gathers while they are away.  Just when I think that I’ve got my kids acting right or that my kid will escape being bullied, I’m thrust back into reality! 

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